e m p t y

Author: ctjuliana / Labels: ,


owhh dear.
i hate dis feeling.so much.

small and tender

Author: ctjuliana / Labels:


I never been in that 'down' situation before

and dis time I did
for the first time in my life

how would it feel?
you never know, till u fall in that situation

seems,
i didn't felt anything
they said that I'm tougher
but they don't know
that I'm bleed inside
it was a silent bleed
as i ignored to wut has happened

my heart is torn,
and now it is getting smaller
and tender to touch..

"talk properly as you wont anybody hurt your feeling"

please,
to be in that 'down' situation,
its really hurt..



no more tears to cry

Author: ctjuliana / Labels:


sometimes i cry
i cry on my own
they flow because my heart is torn..
whenever i feel its hard to carry on..

the world moves fast
and it will pass u by
the world never stop rounding
to see what makes u cry..

the tears of mine
they are warm
be gentle to me please
because i had no more tears to cry..


i am me, jules.

abnormally normal

Author: ctjuliana / Labels:


"you'll be tougher, more than you expected my dear juliana"

"when i looked at you, i knew you love studying O&G"

"Dont lose hope cause i believe you'll be one of my colleagues very soon, am i rite?"

"But, ofcos, being my house officer". He smiled.


abnormally normal, yes i am!!

semua kerana abah

Author: ctjuliana / Labels: , ,


Hanya kini baru ku sedar,
apa yg ku lihat selama ini adalah realiti tersurat,
tanpa melihat apa yg tersirat,
mata hatiku terlalu buta,
terlalu buta untuk menilai besarnya jasa seorang lelaki bernama abah

Dialah,
orang yang maha gembira ketika mendapat tahu mak mengandungkan diriku,
Dialah, orang yang membisikkan suara merdu mengalunkan azan di telinga kecilku
Dialah,
yang mengendong, memberiku tempat duduk terbaek dengan mengangkatku duduk di bahunya,
Dialah, yang memelukku tika aku dalam ketakutan..

Namun begitu,

dia tidak pernah memanjakan ku,

tetapi dialah insan yang tidak akan tidur semalaman ketika ku sakit.

Remaja,

zaman remaja mengajarku erti kemarahan,

secara diam aku memprotes,
provokasi yang berlaku menyebabkan
aku
ingin melarikan diri dari semua,
Doaku dimakbulkan Allah,

Aku gembira dikala itu..


Di kejauhan,
dialah insan yang selalu berfikir,
bertungkus lumus memberi ku kesenangan,

dia rela melupakan keinginannya,
segala keperluanku diberikan,
segala permintaanku disempurnakan,
walaupun lambat penyempurnaannya,
dia tetap menyempurnakannya..


Kini,

baru kusedari,

garis garis kedutan di dahi abah kian menjalar,

tangannya kini kian kasar,
meskipun begitu,
abah tidak pernah berhenti..

Abah mengajarku erti berdirikari,
hanya kini aku tersedar,

pengajaranmu abah,

membuatkan ku lari dari mu,

mata hatiku terlalu buta,


Abah tidak pernah menyatakan perasaan bangga dan sayangnya padaku,

namun tindakan dan perilakunya mercerminkan segalanya,

Dia, begitu senang hati pabila aku menasihatinya berhenti merokok,

Dia, begitu senang hati pabila aku menceritakan pengalaman ku di hospital,
Dia, insan, seorang lelaki bernama abah..


Abah,

Dikesempatan ini,
sempena hari lahirmu ke 50..

ku coretkan secebis coretan untukmu,,

Tidak terbalas segala jasamu padaku..

kecuali, jazakallah bil jannah..

anakmu sentiasa mendoakan mu,
Selamat Hari Lahir Abah..

Hes Leaving..

Author: ctjuliana / Labels: ,


Hes Leaving

"have a safe journey dear"

May Allah watches over you

till see u again next time
i'll be waiting for you :)


Listening to, leaving on a jet plane by Chantal Kreviaziuk
this song reminds me to my old fren ;)

you..stupidos!!

Author: ctjuliana / Labels: ,

stupidos ( x sanggop plak nk tulis stup*d)

angry

mad

"to whom?"

"to myself laa.."

"why.."

"i screwed myself"

"i spoiled my O&G osce paper"


Geramnyer..mendidih je dalam hati ni..
Tuhan je taw..
its really direction questions..
pointed directly to ur brain..
and u may get the answers..
provided u really focus during clinical posting..
(not during the exam week!!)
like i did..
yeah! i screwed, i spoiled osce paper**
dush dush dush..
padan muke aku! =))))

hmm..its already past!
i try my best..but not to d fullest
i spoiled them
my fault..(=_=)
unforgiven mistakes of mine
sorry o&g

you!! stupidos
moodiness, cry out loud girl!!