" Along sayang abah "
I never used the chances given by Allah to say it out-loud
what kind of daughter would I be?
If i failed to say this precious sentence?
I wanna say it. Desperately want to. but it just too difficult. I've tried once during our family dinner together. Unfortunately this lips turned out to say nothing. ***big sigh....
Why is that so? maybe..the impact of childhood history still affect my emotion. Really. He is the man that i afraid the most. I was too afraid of him. If i can count..I'm the only child whom got scolded so much. I'm not a naughty girl. It just unlucky to be the first child. Maybe. Long time ago..i used to be jealous of my second sister. Abah always loves her. Everything she did, abah always granted her with present/compliment. She was good in sports and abah wanted her child to be an athlete. In contrast, i was good in academic. And that makes me study harder. I want to hear abah say "abah bangga dengan along". at least once.
Alhamdulillah. I heard it twice. satisfied? yes i am.
Since i entered boarding school (i was 16 by that time) i was the happiest person on earth!! far away from family makes me feel easier to breath. yes. far from any voices that used to scold me for no reason. but yet, i was wrong. it turned out to be the opposite. I miss them. severely homesick during the earliest days in boarding school. I miss Abah man's voices for waking me up at 6a.m in the morning. everyday. I miss abah scolding me for get my sleep late. hahhh....
As i grew up older the more i realized Abah's love towards me. He is the one who helped me when car out of sudden broke down. no matter how far he was at that time, he still say "okey no problem jangan panic. abah datang kejap lg". He is the one who asking me "duit belanja cukup tak". he is the one drove my mom visit me every week during my final exam. he is the one who picked and sent me to anywhere i asked him to. No matter how late the time, how tired he was, he still doing it for his daughter. Until now,he is the one who drove me to where ever place that i need to go (not to say that i didn't own the license!! he volunteered himself). he is the one who get nervous when i had my SPA's interview. yup, he is the man! i believe, every father in this world did the same things. At least willing to do the same things if they are able to do so.
Hence, lets us have some times extra praying on our hero, A man called father. Wish him a good health and wealth. treasures every loves he shows.
"Abah, jikalau sekalipun along tak berjaya mengucapkan. Along nak abah tahu, Along sayang Abah."
lol,
jules.